Super Sub

It is with great pleasure that I am able to impart news of a development of the positive variety in the planning for my bicycle adventure. We have a Super Sub!
You may remember, in my last installment, I explained that my dad - the inspiration for the ride - was not going to be able to provide vital support owing to health problems. That was a major blow, and will of course remain so, but at least the ride can proceed thanks to a very kind offer (eagerly snapped up) of an old family friend - step forward and take a bow (Uncle) Nev Greensmith.
Nev isn’t a real uncle,  but if it was performance-related he would be right up there in the League of Real Uncles.  He knows a thing or two about cycling as well which could be useful, seeing as I don’t.
He was also present at two of the more memorable events of my life - The 1979 European Cup final in Munich, and a laugh-a-mile coast-to-coast ride with our mountain bike gang 11 years ago. So, Nev’s a darned good sub - thanks.
In other news this week I have taken the decision to re-classify myself from ‘road cyclist’ to ‘touring cyclist’. This re-classification (which has yet to be ratified by the British Cycling Federation) is based mainly on speed.
I get overtaken a fair amount by flash young upstarts (oh, yes old upstarts as well) and feel that if I become a ‘touring cyclist’ these overtakes would no longer be deemed legitimate manoeuvres and therefore I get to feel a lot better about it all.
The whole ‘left for dead’ business reached crisis point earlier in the week when some Sky team-wannabe went past me so quickly I mistakenly thought I had stopped, and tried to get off. Even though I was only registering 11mph on the speedo let me tell you it’s really not a good idea to dismount at this speed.
So, hopefully my new classification will be confirmed before I start my LEJOG ride on Sunday 22nd May and I will be able to bellow at all passing cyclists - ‘you haven’t really overtaken me, I’m a tourist’. I realise I may have to practice saying that quickly so they get the full gist while still in ear-shot.
In any case I think my resignation as a ‘road cyclist’ may only just have pre-empted being struck-off on a number of counts including...

consistently traveling at embarrassingly slow speeds
refusal to shave legs
non-ownership of at least one professional team replica top
ownership of a cycle clip

I’ll keep you posted.

Jez